Gulanzhu
of house Peppercorn found himself moistened by the pillow he lay upon, for it was soaked in his own slobber. He rose from his slumber with great displeasure, already making demands of his chamber maid before he could bother to open both eyes. After being cleansed and dressed Avornim took to the market, shopping list in hand. His goal; to gather the ingredients needed for the dinner he was preparing come tomorrow evening. By using his incredibly sly wit, Avornim had managed to convince the king to forgive his prior transgressions given he could impress him and his royal family with the most delicious meal they had ever eaten.
— Antiphon Boardain, The Road to Royal Chef
Far beneath city surfaces, down dark damp alleyways, and behind the doors of seedy businesses, gulanzhu families often run amok. As a result of their laziness and general ineptitude, gulanzhu are incapable of prospering in a community of only their kind, and as a solution they prefer to settle in a large diverse society where they can manipulate others from the comfort of their dining hall.
Just like a common street gang, families of gulanzhu vie for power and territory whether it be in the slums of cities, or the bracken swamplands that they sometimes occupy with their slave encampments. One way or another, every gulanzhu can have their ties traced back to the black market, slave trade, or some other illegal, underhanded, disdainful business.
Unpleasantly Plump
Gulanzhu are morbidly obese humanoids with skins colors such as black, brown, pink, and peach. When not slouching, which is practically never, they can stand up to 7 feet tall and when fully grown they can weigh up to 800 pounds. Gulanzhu have cloven hands and feet, a small curling tail, and their heads resemble that of a pig's. Owing to their similar appearances, terrible practices, and their abhorrent behaviors, many believe gulanzhu to be descendants of demons from ages past.
Acquired Taste
Gulanzhu have always been known for their cultures ties to the culinary arts. If you can trust a gulanzhu for anything, it's to prepare a good meal, if they offer to do so anyway. As a tradition, the eldest gulanzhu child inherits their family cookbook at age 14. However, not all gulanzhu pursue an interest in the culinary arts. Some are far too lazy to possess even that skill, though they would never admit it, because doing so would bring shame on themselves and their entire family.
In any case, every gulanzhu reveres their family cookbook, because not only does it contain the most delicious recipes known to the family, but it also holds within its pages details of the family's past escapades, accomplishments, and secrets. It is so prized in fact, that gulanzhu children have formed rivalries and lost lives in an attempt to secure it for themselves and their future generations.
Abusive Upbringing
Beginning at an early age, gulanzhu are tutored by their guardians on how to exercise absolute power, especially in cruel and oppressive ways such as with whip discipline. As they grow older these lessons expand to include the arts of manipulation, trade, and deception as a means of ensuring their survival once they come of age.
Gulanzhu Names
A Gulanzhu has a given name and a family name. Historically, their family names would stem from the family founders favorite food ingredient, but that tradition has dwindled over time. Now, most houses just think up the most vile thing that they can muster, usually an attribute of themselves.
Male Names. Babe, Bubba, Curly, Earnest, Franky, Hamilton, Hogger, Pigsy, Porky, Wilbur
Female Names. Annabelle, Buttercup, Charlotte, Dixie, Mabel, Penny, Priscilla, Susie
Family Names. Elvenear, Goodberry, Knucklewart, Muddyrump, Periwinkle, Porkbelly, Rosemary, Rotgut, Stonerind, Tenderloins, Trufflesnout
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Gulanzhu Quirks
| d8 | Quirk |
|---|---|
| 1 | You can't stand being dirty, unless taking a mud bath to cool off |
| 2 | You're never at fault or to be blamed for anything |
| 3 | You refuse to wear armor because it makes you look tough when you don't, not because it won't fit |
| 4 | You hate to see someone hungry, especially yourself |
| 5 | You find it rude when others do not pamper you |
| 6 | Taking charge comes naturally to you, and you can do so even in the most stressful of situations |
| 7 | If you see food left unattended, you will attend to it |
| 8 | You hate when others are being lazy, but believe you deserve to slack off a bit |
Gulanzhu Adventurers
| d6 | Reason for Adventuring |
|---|---|
| 1 | You're on the run from either law enforcement, or your own former slaves |
| 2 | You're seeking new ingredients and recipes to add to your family's cookbook |
| 3 | You're acting on your own "get rich quick" grand scheme |
| 4 | Someone has stolen your family cookbook |
| 5 | You're on the hunt for the perfect slave |
| 6 | You were betrayed by your own family |
Gulanzhu Traits
Your gulanzhu character has a spread of traits that link it with all other gulanzhu.
Ability Score Increase. Your Charisma, Constitution, and Intelligence scores each increase by 1.
Age. Gulanzhu reach maturity around age 14. They age noticeably faster than humans and rarely live longer than 40 years due to their unhealthy lifestyles. Those who survive until old age tend to suffer from high cholesterol and heart disease.
Alignment. Most gulanzhu are considered chaotic evil because they are a cruel and remorseless people whose only concern lies with themselves.
Size. Gulanzhu stand between 5 and 7 feet tall and average about 700 pounds. Your size is Medium.
Speed. Your base walking speed is 25 feet.
Despotic Training. You have proficiency with whips and nets. Furthermore, you can cast command with this trait, using Charisma as your spell casting ability for it. Once you cast this spell, you can't cast it again with this trait until you finish a long rest.
Portly Frame You count as one size larger when a creature attempts to grapple or shove you, and creatures of your size or smaller have disadvantage on checks to do so. Furthermore, you can not squeeze into smaller spaces or make running jumps.
Fiendish Gourmand. You must consume twice the normal amount of food and water daily, and you have advantage on saving throws against disease and ingested poison.
Glutton for Punishment. You believe in fear and pain as a motivator. While wielding a whip, you can use your reaction when a creature within reach makes an ability check to crack your whip. You roll your whips damage die, and the creature adds the result to the result of their roll. A creature can't benefit from this again until it finishes a long rest.
Well Fed. When you would gain the benefits of a short or long rest, you gain an amount of temporary hit points equal to 1d6 + your Constitution modifier. To gain this benefit, you must consume twice as much food as what's normal for you during your downtime, or consume magical food, such as with the heroes feast spell. These temporary hit points stack with other sources of temporary hit points granted by food. Once you benefit from this trait, you can't benefit from it again until you finish a long rest.
Languages. You can speak, read, and write Common. You also know Boarish, a language of grunts, snorts, squeals, oinks, and groans that sound eerily similar to abyssal. Boarish has no written form.
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Racial Feats
If your DM allows the use of feats from chapter 6 of the Player's Handbook, your gulanzhu character has access to the following special feats.
Belly of the Beast
Prerequisites: Gulanzhu
Few gulanzhu posses a gut as impermeable, nor as odious as your own.
- Increase your Constitution by 1, to a maximum of 20.
- Once, after benefiting from your Well Fed trait, you can excrete a staggering cloud of yellow, nauseating gas. For the following turn, each creature that comes within 5 feet of you must make a Constitution saving throw against poison. On a failed save, the creature spends its action that turn retching and reeling. Creatures that don't need to breathe or that are immune to poison automatically succeed on this saving throw. This effect is rendered null in areas of moderate wind.
- When you benefit from your Well Fed trait, add half of your level to the total temporary hit points gained.
Credits
Created by Anthony Vallozzi, you can contact me on reddit as /u/ch33ri000z. You can find my work and follow me for updates at gmbinder.com.
As always, a special thank you to everyone over at the Discord of Many Things for all of their help.
Art in Order of Appearance
"Clutter set 03" by Magical Kaleidoscope
"The Gut" by Tahiwi Trenor-Hunt
"Fantasy Food" by Ryan Didcote
"Pig Yakuza" by Callen Desmond
"Assassin's Creed Swamp" by Michael Guimont
"Zhu Bajie" by Lee Kent
Gulanzhu Culinarian
Prerequisites: Gulanzhu
You've taken up the knife and fork in order to uphold your families honor.
- You gain proficiency with cook's utensils, and add double your proficiency bonus to any check involving them, instead of your normal proficiency bonus.
- You can use your cook's utensils as your spellcasting focus, or as simple weapons with the dagger statistics.
- When you prepare a meal during a long rest, you can make a check using your cook's utensils and choose to benefit either temporary hit points or Constitution saving throws. If temporary hit points are chosen, they are immediately rolled and applied individually by each participant.
If Constitution saving throws is chosen, each participant may roll their bonus dice after any single Constitution saving throw made during the duration.
To gain this benefit a creature must partake in the meal during the long rest that it is cooked during.
The benefit that each participant receives lasts 12 hours.
| Check Result | Bonus |
|---|---|
| 2 - 10 | 0 |
| 11 - 20 | 1d4 |
| 21 - 30 | 2d4 |
| 31 - 40 | 3d4 |
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